Hi, I’m Liviu Beschieri, currently in Padova, Italy.
Finding the work I love has been a challenging journey for me too. Early in my teens I discovered that I devoured self help books like How to Win Friends and Influence People, or The 5 Love Languages. It blew my mind at the time that you could actually understand people…
And those books opened my eyes to doing so. Not just people, but Life itself. Deeply and clearly.
And that’s what I did for the last 15 years since. Going through many hundreds of books, dozens of teachers, and much time for philosophical reflection.
I’m 32 now, and my path has been varied. First I was a writer about long distance relationships. I had a blog. Which became popular. Wrote some books. Then eventually people wanted personal help, so I become a relationship coach. Which I did for about 5 years. Helping men (and some women) overcome their needy view and approach to relationships. In other words, changing their insecure mindset for love.
I was in a relationship myself, eventually married. And things were good. In a way. I was doing work I loved, had a lovely partner. My coaching work was beginning to really take off too.
At the same time, about 9 years ago I discovered the richness of spirituality. And eventually the confusion of it. And so my spiritual journey of awakening began, and still goes on, hopefully toward liberation sooner or later.
So, for a couple of years, I was doing quite well, enjoying my relationship and growing my coaching practice. Living in different countries, as I worked online and moved around with my wife’s cooking studies.
However, about 4 years ago I found myself no longer feeling passionate about neither my marriage, nor my relationship coaching work. Which was very strange. Because both were great.
To keep the story short. A few months later I found the clarity and courage to let go of my marriage and drop my coaching work.
I was free.
I noticed that my coaching sessions started to drain me at one point, rather than energize me, like they used to.
And my 9 year relationship, even though my wife was the loveliest woman I knew, I felt like I no longer appreciated our relationship like I should. Like she deserved. So I knew I had to let it go.
One thing we learn on this journey to Secure Being, is that there may come a time when we have to let go of even GREAT things, like my coaching work, and my comforting marriage, to make room for the next truly aligned ones.
And what followed is something I did not expect.
I left my marriage and coaching work about 4 years ago, and I was hoping that I would soon start doing some life and spiritual coaching, because that was my burning passion at the time.
But what followed, I did not expect, to be honest.
Which is that, I committed to being fully true to myself and what felt right to do. To completely follow my joy every moment of my day, and week, and month…
And what followed is actually, almost 4 years now, of not really doing any work. Or making any money for that matter. How did I survive so far? Some economies at first, and then divine bounteousness, flowing through my close family, in a strange and synchronistic way. This experience in itself is a valuable teaching story actually… about facing our deepest fear when it comes to work, the core fear of running out of money. So, you may hear me draw some key lessons from it, if we eventually work together.
Why am I sharing all this?
Well, because it’s the truth. But more importantly, because what I did in these 4 years, was live a very charming and simple lifestyle. One of actual embodiment of the Secure Being philosophy, that I’ve been developing over the last decade, and deepening of it.
If you can imagine a young man, living alone mostly, and spending most of his time 1) Studying from various spiritual teachers 2) Having walks and coffees 3) Suffering and facing lots of fears about his life 4) Dealing with some mysterious chronic health problems.
I eventually came to call it a Contemplative Lifestyle. Lots of cappucinos and contemplations about what it means to live your joy. To live a life that represents you, in all ways. In your romantic life, in your creative life, your bodily life, and your spiritual one.
What does it mean to Live Your Joy?
For me this simple word JOY encapsulates a lot of things. But for simplicity it means being true to yourself, and doing so in a natural Wu-Wei like manner.
Wu-Wei means non-doing in Taoist philosophy (which I love), or doing what is natural, and not forced.
Being lived by The Tao. Letting life live you. The intelligence of life. The Logos, to move and inspire you. To create your life through you, through your joy – relational, creative, physical, spiritual – joy.
And as you may soon begin to realize from my work, the only thing stopping you from that, is your insecure mindset, as it relates to each of these areas.
For many years, I was helping men overcome their insecure mindset in their love life. So they could finally access their ability to let joy guide them in their romantic life. And the transformations these men have had were beautiful to watch. Very inspiring and freeing for them. Even years later, some men still write to thank me occasionally for the work we did together.
It feels good to know that I had a positive impact in their lives.
And now, after 4 years of “doing nothing” type of hiatus, I’m feeling called to start being useful again. This time, to help people do work they love. Work they truly love.
Joy Based Work
But, one of the key lessons that I’ve noticed when it comes to doing work you love, is that it’s not really about finding the work, at first. It’s actually about a MAJOR internal transformation that’s required to be able to really step into this brave way to live – to actually have the courage to make authentic choices in this part of your life.
Watching my own journey progress; and literally over a hundred other biographical stories, that I’ve studied over these past 4 years, I’ve noticed that doing work you love is the most fulfilling way to live, yet it’s something very few people really get to do. Simply because it requires a level of maturity in the face of our fears, that few people arrive at… A maturity that allows you to follow your joy, even in the face of endless uncertainty, unknown and insecurity.
There’s a big difference between working to make money, and working to have fun. It’s like they are on two opposing sides of a river. And each has its own way of seeing work. Each has a different mindset for work.
One is an insecure mindset, seeing work as a source of security, with money and self affirmation as key motivators. And the other is a secure mindset for work. Which requires a mature and healthy view of what work really is. And living that view consistently.
But crossing this river, from the side of struggle, to the side of aligned work, type of paradise, is not an easy feat. It took me these last 4 years of facing my own insecurity, as I continued to follow my heart, to even begin to see the other shore.
And what I’ve learned is that it’s not about just finding the right, passionate and purposeful work, but becoming mature enough for it. This is the journey of mastery. The journey of becoming a true master: which is learning to be true to your authentic creative expression, even in the face of mountains of fear rising inside of you to steer you away.
That’s my much simplified story.
And to come full circle… What I can say now, with relative confidence, is that I eventually started seeing my other side of the shore.
It became clear about a year ago, when I wrote my first memoir. It took me 3 years of reflecting and suffering about my new direction in life, to eventually see it: My joy based work is facilitating freedom and clarity for people.
Leading people on the path to Secure Being, and out of Insecure Being in all areas of life.
Guiding you out of your insecure mindset, so you can have the courage to follow your joy and live better. A meaningful life.
No longer distorted by an insecure mindset.
Live better,
Liviu Beschieri
Mystic and Coach
If you’d like to reach out for an exploratory coaching session, or with any other question, you can find me at: joy@securebeing.org
A quick snapshot of things mentioned.
